I call them snapshots: those moments frozen in time when you remember exactly where you were, when it was, who was there with you – every detail marked indelibly on your mind. While some memories can be very positive, such as your first kiss, getting accepted into college or even having a favorite meal, some are not so pleasant. When something triggers a bad memory it can put you right back there and you experience it all over again. This could be anything, such as a song, a taste, a smell, or an offhand comment. Maybe you got teased in school, and a particular phrase reminds you of that, or maybe a certain song reminds you of a difficult breakup. What do you do with this memory?
Often when this happens I try to take a step back out of that snapshot and look at it from a different angle. There have been many times that I’ve been able to use a memory, even a bad one, for my greater good and have come to recognize that the experience was a valuable learning tool for me.
When I was much younger, I remember the children in my neighborhood made fun of me because I spoke Dutch. They called me stupid, because I was just learning English, and could not understand them. One day my mother approached those children and started speaking to them in Dutch, and of course they didn’t know what she was saying. She then asked them in English how come they could not understand her – were they stupid? After that, things became better, and later on, every time I heard another language spoken, I would think of that time. In my adult years, it has made me much more accepting and understanding of people who are “different”. I have been able to use that experience to propel me forward into a new perspective.
Many of the memories I draw the most strength from are snapshots of a moment spent in nature. One night, several years ago, I was in Yosemite National Park attending a special stargazing event. I was with my hiking buddy, my daughter, who is also very present with her memories. I have never seen so many stars in my life. The night sky was completely filled with them, reflecting a clarity and density that was mesmerizing. It was so awesome and wondrous that I often go back to that place to remember and savor. I feel centered and in union with the world when I think of that moment.
I draw strength memories such as these, both good and bad, and that helps me so much in the here and now. I often hear someone say, ”if that had not happened to me, I would not have done this, or met this person, or found that thing that has brought me great joy, gratitude, and/or made a tremendous difference in my life.” Often that perspective does not come to us until much later, for at the time, things did not feel so good. So, the timeline is not always ours to determine, but powerful lessons can come out of that experience, such as forgiveness, acceptance, trust, honesty, humility and perseverance.
Now that we are in a new year, looking back to 2011 and beyond, what memories can you repurpose to empower you? Which do you want to hold onto, and which would you like to let go? How can your memories help you move forward?
Let’s use these snapshots to create an amazing album of useful images and powerful visions for our future…
Ingrid Sarrat